A lot of the fandom seems to be freaking out about this so let’s talk about it!
This was actually one of my favourite scenes from the episode. Not because of any kind of impending drama but because this conversation has honestly been a long time coming.
After episode 7, there was no relationship talk. Victor and Yuuri have yet to sit down and tell each other straight up what they want out of their relationship (both personally and professionally). Flash back to episode 4 where Victor was asking what he should be to Yuuri. Now they actually are boyfriends (well, even more than that, fiancés) but same as we’ve never heard them state it, I don’t think they’ve really made it explicitly clear to each other either.
I feel that so far they’ve just been letting things evolve as they go. The Cup of China was actually only a bit over a month ago in-series. Their intimate relationship is still very new and it’s been moving really fast. They’re definitely physically intimate (as you can see by the pushed-together beds) but they haven’t quite connected the same way on the emotional level. They definitely love each other and want to stay with each other, I don’t doubt that for a moment, but they haven’t sat down and said “I want to spend my life with you” to each other. They haven’t told each other what their plans are for their professional relationship either.
We know that Victor has been doing a lot of thinking, and it was very obvious in this episode that he is grieving his career, but it’s also obvious that he doesn’t plan to go back to skating competitively.
Yuuri however, being the anxious person that he is, is reading Victor’s grieving all wrong. Yuuri is thinking that not only is their professional relationship (which he could end simply by retiring) but also their personal relationship is holding Victor back from what he “wants” – to go back to being a competitive skater. And thus we get the line that we did here. This is Yuuri’s attempt to “free” Victor to allow him to chase what Yuuri thinks he actually wants, which turns out could not be any further from the truth.
They aren’t going to break up. I can tell you that right now and with absolute certainty. Rather than this being something that is going to create drama, it is actually going to work to solve it. Yuuri needs to hear from Victor that Victor has no intention of leaving and that he wants to stay with Yuuri more than he wants to continue his skating career. Also very important is that Victor needs to say it out loud. Victor is a thinker, he rarely makes big decisions on a whim. He’s been processing what he wants to do with his life for a year now and he has definitely come to his decision (as was evident in episode 10).
Victor has chosen Yuuri over his skating career and this line from episode 11 is just the gateway to the discussion that will firmly cement their personal relationship in place. And the final bow-tie on the gift that is their relationship will be the duet skate at the end of the episode.
It’s not wrong, I wouldn’t say – it’s just a different interpretation.
But the literal meaning is quite a bit darker.
Victor says 「自分の首を締める枷でもあった。」
“It also was a shackle closed around my neck.”
Like I said, the translation is not exactly wrong, but the original words make it clear that it made Victor feel like a prisoner, bound to his career/decisions against his will. You could even say that he felt like he was suffocating.
It paints a bit of a different picture, doesn’t it?
to all you people who still think it would make sense for victor to return to competitive skating, please see above.
Guys, ep 11 was rough, but it makes a LOT of sense. Yuuri has anxiety and not just any kind, but self-worth related anxiety. Furthermore he thinks Victor has only fallen in love with him because of their skating routine – he doesn’t remember the banquet dance-off. Specifically, he thinks Victor has fallen in love with a spark that he sees in Yuuri’s skating. He thinks Victor’s love is conditional.
Which is probably why he protested the engagement confusion last episode. He thinks this is temporary. He thinks Victor is just infatuated. Maybe he started to believe in something better for a second, in the airport, but anxiety is bound to take hold and make him question everything. And we saw that, this episode, IMO.
When Yuuri sees Victor watch other skaters perform amazing feats, he instantly enters that anxious state of “I’m not good enough to keep this” And since he, himself, didn’t perform his best, he thinks it’s going to be all downhill from here. Victor will, in his anxious mind, fall quickly out of love with him once there’s nothing “special” about him. He may even start becoming infatuated with another young skater.
So what do people with anxiety and self-worth issues do? SELF SABOTAGE. Woo! There’s less anxiety if you’re the one who controls how things fall apart. It’d be more stressful for Yuuri to stay in a relationship that he thinks is doomed. It would mean that every second of every day, he’s just waiting and watching for Victor to drift away. So he’d rather rip off the bandaid now, grieve all at once, and then move on. Because even if Victor is upset now, Yuuri believes that too will pass and he’ll be “free” of his delusion that he really loved Yuuri.
So yeah, we’re all just screaming at our TVs, but this is what people with anxiety do. All the time. It’s totally IC. And it’s the one obstacle that Victuuri has, really – dealing with Yuuri’s anxiety. Because love, however true, doesn’t make mental illness go away. Nor does winning gold, if he manages that in the free skate. These two, if they are to last, need to face the full reality of Yuuri’s anxiety. It wouldn’t be a happy ending if they didn’t solve this first.
Kudos to Kubo-sensei for the writing so far, and here’s hoping that next episode brings everything together in a way that respects the universe she’s created so far, and doesn’t just shove everyone together in a fake-happy ending.
i’m honestly not surprised by the ending?? like we’ve seen so many instances where yuuri wanted to “end” things with victor i.e. have him step down as his coach. pretty sure he doesn’t wanna break up with his fiancee a day after their engagement, but this conversation was bound to happen ever since episode 9 – heck, probably even earlier than that, since yuuri has always asked himself the question of what victor is gonna do after GPF/if he doesn’t win gold. and the new episode just confirmed that yuuri probably feels that he’s robbing victor away from his career/robbing the figure skating world of victor.
honestly i just need them to talk things out, and i’m pretty sure we won’t be disappointed because they’ve consistently proven themselves to be such a healthy couple so yeah….
my hopes for the next ep aside from yuuri executing a perfect FS: victor telling yuuri honestly about what he wants to do from here on out (marry yuuri?? adopt a few kids and a new poodle?? permanently live in hasetsu?? never wanting yuuri to retire so he can be his coach forever?? opening a skating school in hasetsu?? whatever it is, i’d be happy as long as they’re together)
Nothing but My Aching Soul 