inkskinned:

it is tiring, being endless political just as someone existing. my teacher asks me if i’m writing more of that “feminist poetry.” a lot of it is just talking about me, being a woman, being afraid in the city. i write about walking a line, about how i am expected to choose between home and work, how each comes with a slew of its own insults; how it feels when i am wearing shorts and there are too many men outside. these are just facts of my life. someone in the comments says, “where are woman even coming up with these crazy generalizations in their feminism?”

i hold hands with the prettiest girl i’ve ever seen and someone sighs when they see me. “do they have to make everything gay?” she asks her friend, loudly, “like, do you have to force those views in my face all the time?” i can’t stop blushing. my girlfriend holds my fingers tighter, tighter, tighter, until my knuckles are white, and i let her. somehow, this is us, protesting.

my father’s cuban blood stains my skin, i think. when i am honored with a position in the dean’s private council, a boy sneers, “you only got in because you’re hispanic.” did i? i spend the rest of our meetings wondering if i was selected for my stellar academic record, for the multiple recommendations, for the clubs i lead – or if i was just a move the dean made, to make use of me. when we all take a picture, the dean brings me in the front. in the first three we take, i am not smiling.

it is odd. “i exist.” i say, “i deserve to exist.”

“oh my god,” he groans, “we get it, you’re a feminist.”

stcrlghts:

(in case you wanted to know because i fucking love this language) 

• ad astra per aspera – to the stars through difficulties 
• alis volat propriis – he flies by his own wings 
• amantium irae amoris integratio est – the quarrels of lovers are the renewal of love 
• ars longa, vita brevis – art is long, life is short 
• aut insanity homo, aut versus facit – the fellow is either mad or he is composing verses 
• dum spiro spero – while I breathe, I hope 
• ense petit placidam sub libertate quietem – with the sword, she seeks peace under liberty 
• exigo a me non ut optimus par sim sed ut malis melior – I require myself not to be equal to the best, but to be better than the bad
• experiential docet – experience teaches 
• helluo librorum – a glutton for books (bookworm) 
• in libras libertas – in books, freedom 
• littera scripta manet – the written letter lasts 
• mens regnum bona possidet – an honest heart is a kingdom in itself 
• mirabile dictu – wonderful to say 
• nullus est liber tam malus ut non aliqua parte prosit – there is no book so bad that it is not profitable in some part 
• omnia iam fient quae posse negabam – everything which I used to say could not happen, will happen now 
• poeta nascitur, non fit – the poet is born, not made 
• qui dedit benificium taceat; narrat qui accepit – let him who has done a good deed be silent; let him who has received it tell it 
• saepe ne utile quidem est scire quid futurum sit – often, it is not advantageous to know what will be 
• sedit qui timuit ne non succederet – he who feared he would not succeed sat still 
• si vis pacem, para bellum – if you want peace, prepare for war 
• struit insidias lacrimis cum feminia plorat – when a woman weeps, she is setting traps with her tears 
• sub rosa – under the rose 
• trahimir omnes laudis studio – we are led on by our eagerness for praise
• urbem latericium invenit, marmoream reliquit – he found the city a city of bricks; he left it a city of marble 
• ut incepit fidelis sic permanet – as loyal as she began, so she remains