this is honestly the funniest thing ive read all week

reneewvlkers:

a Very Serious Headcanon with kat @sacrebleusargent

instead of the foxes, they are the bees. palmetto state bees.

their lifelong rivals are the yellowjackets

“they are composed only of hate and can sting multiple times, those bastards,” dan whispers reverently

wymack’s best speech is composed only of “i fucking hate hornets. swat them.”

the bees’ uniform is yellow and black, and the yellowjackets’ is black and yellow

kathy tries to sound suave on her show but “what will it be, Kevin? black and yellow or yellow and black?” only sounds good in the bee movie

(an alternative – “honey or torment and terror?”)

speaking of the bee movie, it’s mandatory viewing for all freshmen on the team

nicky suggests it every movie night

he no longer gets a vote on movie night

kevin is queen bee, which is canon

the ravens live in a hive. it’s a glorified tree house.

they also make loud buzzing noises to intimidate, and sometimes poke people. it’s like a sting. very terrifying, not cute at all

and their theme song is black and yellow by wiz khalifa

instead of putting a dead fox in the foxes’ cars, they put hives in them

(they’re ruthless)

seth dies by bee sting. he’s allergic

neil, the next day: he’s literally a bee. he’s allergic to them. he had to know this would end badly

everyone: the man died. like, permanently

neil: you don’t tempt fate like that

the girls all call each other honey. and so does matt

and for halloween they all dress up as bees

everyone calls betsy “bee”, except andrew, who can’t be #mainstream, so he calls her bethany

“that’s not my name,” betsy says, once

andrew does not acknowledge this