Dissociating is one of the most common responses to abuse and trauma. It involves feeling numb, detached or unreal and (while it happens to everyone once in a while) is experienced more frequently and severely in survivors. Dissociating people vary widely in symptoms and may experience any or all of the things from the following list.
You may be dissociating if you:
find yourself staring at one spot, not thinking anything
feel completely numb
feel like you’re not really in your body, like you’re watching yourself in a movie.
feel suddenly lightheaded or dizzy
lose the plot of the show or conversation you were focused on
feel as if you’re not quite real, like you’re in a dream
feel like you’re floating
suddenly feel like you’re not a part of the world around you
feel detached and far away from other people, who may seem mechanical or unreal to you
are very startled when someone/something gets your attention
completely forget what you were thinking just a moment ago
suddenly cover your face or react as if you’re about to be hurt for no reason
can’t remember important information about yourself, like your age or where you live
find yourself rocking back and forth
become very focused on a small or trivial object or event
find that voices, sounds or writing seem far away and you sometimes have trouble understanding them.
feel as if you’ve just experienced a flashback (perhaps rapidly) but you can’t remember anything about it.
perceive your body as foreign or not belonging to you
Disclaimer: French people complain a lot. A lot. Don’t be surprised if 90% of these expressions are complaining.
Non mais oh – say this if someone does something mildly annoying and you want to express your shock and distaste.
Tu me fais chier – (alt.tu me fais chier, là.) literally ‘you make me shit’. means you’re pissing me off.
Carrément – translates to ‘squarely’. Means ‘literally’. If someone tells you something surprising or annoying, you can answer simply “ah carrément.” see: tu me fais carrément chier.
J’hallucine / je rêve – are you annoyed by something? say these.
C’est pas possible – a classic. anything bad happens – c’est pas possible. There is no cheese left? It’s not possible. I’m hallucinating. This is a burden on me that solely I can bear I cannot believe this is happening.
Ça commence à me gaver – I’m starting to get real sick of this. see:
Ça commence carrément a me gaver
là, putain.
T’es relou – verlan slang for ‘lourd’ meaning someone’s heavy, personality-wise. They’re tedious.
Ça me saoûle / ça me gonfle – similar to gaver, means something’s pissing you off, you’re sick of it.
Grave – totally.
C’est clair – totally/that’s clear. Like ‘claro’ in spanish. “Justine elle est trop relou” “C’est clair. Elle me fait chier.”
J’en ai marre – I’m sick of this.
J’en ai ras le bol – I’m sick of this.
J’en ai ras le cul – I’m sick of this (vulgar).
(J’en ai) Rien à battre – I don’t give a damn.
(J’en ai) Rien à foutre – I don’t give a fuck.
C’est bon, là. – That’s enough.
Perso, euh, – “Personally,” generally used at the start of a complaining sentence, to express how personal the matter is to you. Perso, euh, c’est bon là.
J’en ai ras le cul.
Rôh là – general expression of distaste. Le longer the rôh, the more annoyed you are. Rôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôôh, c’est quoi ce bordel.
C’est quoi ce bordel ? – translates to “what’s this brothel”, means “what’s this shit?!”
C’est de la merde – It’s shit.
C’est une blague ? – Is this a joke?
Idem – ditto
J’ai la dal – I’m hungry
Ça caille – It’s freezing
Ouf – two meanings 1. phew or 2. verlan for “fou”, meaning crazy (as a noun or adjective). “Kévin, c’est un ouf! Il fait du vélo sans casque!” “Ouais carrément, c’était un truc de ouf!”
Kévin – there’s a running joke that all the young delinquents seem to be called Kévin.
Crever – slang for “to die”. Va crever, connard!
Connard/Connasse – c*nt, but a lot less vulgar in french peoples eyes
And finally,
T’es con. No English translation can express the power behind the words “t’es con”. While it may sort of translate to “you’re a c*nt/idiot”, it expresses something much deeper. You really are a god damn fool.
“T’es con” is also a thing you can say to your friend when he said a “connerie”, but not a big one, a funny silly thing.
J’ai le seum – I’m angry/frustrated
Tu déconnes ?! – “You’re lying?!”
Boulet – Litterally “Burden”. It’s an insult, it means “Lame”, Oh le boulet !
Bolosser – Verb meaning “Victimiz, persecute someone”. The noun is Boloss which means victim, lame.
Pigeon – Someone who is easy to con
Se faire pécho – Being caught. Pécho is verlan slang for “choper”. It can mean “pick up”. Depend the context.
Miskine – pitiful
A la wannagain or A l’arrache – Doing something without preparation, improvize
A plus ! – Means “bye”, “later”
Les condés, les poulets, les flics, les keufs, les poulaga – slang for policemen
Un zéro-six – a cellphone number (in France, every cellphone number begins by “06″; but recently, there are 07 too)
A la bien – describe a relaxing situation
Aboule – slang for “Give”
J’ai capté – I understood
On se capte plus tard – We meet later
Ma gueule – Affectionnate nickname for close friends
Mange tes morts – “Eat you deads”, an insult
Sur la vie de ma mère – When you swear you say the truth “On my mother’s life” literally
the politics of light and dark are everywhere in our vocabulary…psa to writers: subvert this, reveal whiteness and lightness as sometimes artificial and violent, and darkness as healing, the unknown as natural
Some ideas for bad things that are white/light:
lightning, very hot fire
snow storms, ice, frost on crops
some types of fungus/mold
corpses, ghosts, bones, a diseased person
clothing, skin tone, hair, etc. of a bad person
fur, teeth, eyes of an attacking animal/monster
bleached out deserts, dead trees, lifeless places
poison
Some ideas for good things that are black/dark:
rich earth/soil
chocolate, truffles, wine, cooked meat
friendly animals/pets/creatures
a character’s favorite vehicle, technology, coat, etc.
a pleasant night
hair, skin tone, clothing, etc. of a good person
undisturbed water of a lake
the case/container of something important
valued wood, furniture, art
velvet
Think to burn, to infect, to bleach vs. to enrich, to protect, to be of substance.
completely double spaced version on google docs here – this post is more blocky for the sake of people’s dashboards, but still long so people will be less likely to glaze over it. my apologies if that makes it hard to read
things to look for and avoid in an autistic character
• symptoms only manifesting as “nonverbal and rocking”
• super smart / living calculator
• super dumb / doesn’t understand anything
• all the symptoms you can come up with for them are “awkward” and “has special interest(s)” (please do more research)
• trains, technology, and/or math as special interests
• acting like a child
•
getting treated like a baby
• unreasonably cruel and uncaring about others’ reactions to them being cruel
• if they’re comparable to sheldon from the big bang theory, start over
• animal comparisons
• a lack of feelings
• please no stories about what it’s like to be autistic told by allistics
talking about things outside of special interests (again…. come on……….) (special interests are usually the default things our brains go to when theres no stimulation or we want to entertain ourselves – it isn’t literally all we think or talk about ever. if a conversation has no connections to a special interest, reconsider having your autistic character bring it up in a context that is not an introduction.)
•
explicitly expressed to be capable of attraction and romantic feelings – if your character is an adult, add sexual feelings to this point
•
capable of general functioning, just with a disability that makes it more difficult – not a walking disability (….sigh)
• a wide amount of feelings and emotional turmoil (but perhaps only being able to express it in limited ways)
• we’re people
• just people whose brains are wired differently
things to avoid in research for an autistic character
•
autism moms / autism blogs and websites not run by autistic people
•
any affiliation with autism $peaks means you should walk away and never look back
•
a scientist trying to create explanations for what autistic people do without actually asking / not mentioning asking autistic people
• anything about a cure for autism
• a person that “worked with autistic kids” phrased in the same way as “worked with animals”
• talking about autistic people as if they are mysteries, are like animals, or are otherwise othered weirdos instead of people
things to look for in research for an autistic character
•
actual autistic people talking about their experiences and symptoms
• just stick to that and you’re good but it’s hard to find sometimes ngl. just look for the above red flags
things i would personally like to see in an autistic character
• less easy to swallow sadness and more destructive anger. i would love to see a canonically autistic character who was frustrated easily by small things and had trouble communicating why •
not a story about being autistic, a story that happens to have a character or characters who are autistic – it isn’t pointed out or questioned, they’re right at home with the rest of the cast and not othered (a la symmetra from overwatch) •
intensive sensory issues / small sounds making large reactions • clear communications about not liking x sensory thing (for example being touched) •
poor motor skills / clumsiness and not being laughed at for it • walking funny (body bent downwards, walking very fast, walking slowly,
big strides, shuffling, stiffness, etc) – no one treats it as if it’s funny or something totally strange • a big personality that has a presence so they can’t be cast aside (but feel free to have quiet characters too) – if this was along with being nonverbal they would probably leap to being one of my favorite characters ever • a fear of asking for clarification on sarcasm or jokes because of past experiences and an arc about the character becoming more comfortable asking questions
>> if any fellow autistic people want to add something, feel free <<
allistics are encouraged to rb this
oh man thank you so much for this! i’ve been trying to quietly develop a character i’ve had for years and the story he’s in, and i’ve been seriously considering him being autistic/having aspergers syndrome, and i’ve been having trouble finding info that’s not from Autism Speaks or something similar
i wanted to post on this because i’d like feedback from anyone who has the background to do so about something that this post pointed out: this character of mine is based in a sci-fi story, and is an alien (not the best representation, i know, but there are very few humans in the plot, so i figured one of the lead characters being autistic would at least be something positive). his species are sentient, intelligent and bipedal, much like humans, but are somewhat animal-like when it comes to appearance and some behaviours. would it be insensitive/offensive to have an autistic character be a member of such a species? animal comparisons were listed in the DO NOT section, which is completely understandable, so i could really use some feedback
THAT FIRST SITE IS EVERY WRITER’S DREAM DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES I’VE TRIED WRITING SOMETHING AND THOUGHT GOD DAMN IS THERE A SPECIFIC WORD FOR WHAT I’M USING TWO SENTENCES TO DESCRIBE AND JUST GETTING A BUNCH OF SHIT GOOGLE RESULTS
Roads and paths pervade our literature,
poetry, artwork, linguistic expressions and music. Even photographers
can’t keep their eyes (and lenses) off of a beautiful road or path,
which is why we collected this list of 28 amazing photos of paths. Source: boredpanda
Autumn In The White Carpathians
Rhododendron Laden Path, Mount Rogers, Virginia, USA
Writing is a craft. It takes time for anyone to learn
and improve. But there are some shortcuts you can try, maybe adapt to your own needs. Here are 11 writing problems and their solutions, or hacks.
Too many ideas syndrome
Problem: You have too many equally good story ideas
and can’t pick just one to write.
Solution: Select your top 3 favorite stories and
write the first scene of all three. If you can’t decide, write
the first
chapter. The right project will be easier to work with, you’ll have
fun writing it, you will be daydreaming about the story, you will
love the characters. So, give away three chances instead of one.
Outline spoiling the fun
Problem: Whenever you outline a story idea, it
completely spoils your will to write it. The mystery is gone.
Solution: Instead of outlining the whole story, just
make a clear goal on how your characters should end. Will they
succeed? Will they fail? Will they be happy? Will they find
redemption? Will they be wronged? Decide how your story should end
and explore the plot as you go. Remember, no one will read your
first draft, so just write.
Lost midway
Problem: If you are a pantser, you might get lost in
the middle of the story, especially after the first plot point.
Solution: Give your story an ending. If you know where
your characters will end up, you’ll have a better understanding of
which routes to take. Always keep in mind how the story will end. Use
it as the beacon of a lighthouse to guide you through stormy waters.
Creative block
Problem: You don’t have story ideas. Or nothing you
have so far excites you enough for a novel.
Solution: Read a book or watch a movie completely out
of your genre. This works like magic, I promise. I’m not a sci-fi
person, but Akira has given me more story ideas than any movie and
book from my own genre.
Writing anxiety
Problem: You are scared of writing, scared of
starting a new story, or just scared of not doing a good job.
Solution: Write a fanfic. No one expects a fanfic to
be a masterpiece (although many are). Fanfics are done for fun and for
passion. So, write your book in fanfic format. You can even use
fandom characters and aus in the process. When the story is
completed, change back to original characters.
Editing as you write
Problem: You keep going back to previous paragraphs
and editing instead of moving forward with your writing.
Solution: Write your novel by hand. This might sound
like a lot of work, but it’s quite the opposite. The white screen
of the computer urges you to review, to make it perfect, academic
like perfect. The paper however, brings you back to the craft, to the
urge of filling lines and pages. Handwriting also gives you the
opportunity of sketching and doodling.
Solution: Go offline. Turn off your wi-fi. Use a
device without internet connection. Or, if you keep fooling yourself
and turning the internet back on, write your novel by hand. Give
yourself a daily hour of internet, but live offline. And if you take unnecessary trips to the fridge or the bathroom, try the pomodoro technique.
Lack of plots
Problem: Nothing relevant is happening, your story
looks kind of boring. Or the main plot is too weak for a whole novel.
Solution: Take a few days off. Just relax. When you are ready to go back, read what you have written so
far. Maybe you were just tired. But, if
the story really sucks, go back to basics. Ask yourself two questions.
What type of story am I writing? How will this story end? Follow the
answer like a map. Change what needs to be changed, even if you have
to delete the whole progress. If you lack plots, don’t add fillers, just go back to basics.
Weak main character
Problem: Your
character
lacks personality, voice and/or visuals.
Solution: Give your main character three things. An
external battle. An internal battle. And an unique feature. The external
battle is their goal, what they want to achieve, what they dream
about. An internal battle is their fears, traumas, doubts, mental
issues, prejudices and triggers to overcome. An unique feature is what sets them
apart from other characters, maybe they have piercings, or tattoos,
or pink hair, or lilac eyes, maybe they wear neon boots, or a mask,
or mittens, maybe they are left-handed, or blind, maybe they have a scar, or a
birthmark. Every amazing main character has external battles,
internal battles and unique features.
Depression
Problem: You have no will to write. The passion is
gone. You feel empty.
Solution: If you don’t
have access to medical help, reading is a good way to reevaluate your
career and regain your passion for the words. Read lots of books.
Don’t worry about writing, just read. Lose yourself in fictional
adventures. Read sci-fi, romance, horror, fantasy, crime, family
saga, classics, foreigner fictions, fanfics, shorts, poetry. Immerse
in literature. Literature can save lives.
Strange dialogues
Problem: Dialogues seem too formal, or too much like
the narration, or characters lack individuality.
Solution: Read your dialogues out loud while acting
as your characters. You can find a quiet empty room for that. Be an
actor. Go for the emotions. Record your acting sections, after all,
you might improvise at some point.
Nothing but My Aching Soul 