neil: no pls dont put me on tv pls anything but this
neil, looking riko in the eye on live tv: hi yes riko, me, neil josten #10 i live at fox tower and i go running every morning before classes here is my schedule for the semester anywya,s suc k my nuts u worthlses piec e of shit thank
AU where everything is the same except that during movie nights Neil points to anything dead and says me and no one takes him seriously bc he’s a college kid and the Baltimore happens and they realize he was 100% serious