I mean, obviously, I know why. It’s not exactly subtext, the meaning is blatant.
The more accurate question that’s been on my mind is: Why did Andrew tell Neil he’d blow him at all?
Well, Neil asked Andrew why Roland thought he’d been handcuffing Neil, but even then, Andrew didn’t have to confess that engaging in physical acts with Neil was something he had genuinely considered. He could have just said: “Roland thinks we’re a thing.”
This is most likely not a new perspective on this, but I only read this series in April of this year, so, please forgive me:
Andrew’s had a brewing crush on Neil for a while at this point. He’s just been released from rehab. He’s off his meds for good. Neil came back from Evermore beaten black and blue with a Moriyama branding on his face because he didn’t want Andrew to be hurt any more. Neil’s still here. Neil is feeling more and more like a person than a pipedream by the second.
And now Neil’s just asked him to his face why Roland is jumping to conclusions about their private lives.
Maybe Andrew carefully decided to say it, maybe it slipped out in the heat of the moment. Either way, Andrew took one look at the edge, and stepped off, because he wanted to see if this junkie would catch him.
honey: lipstick, a sweet voice, confident laughter, handwritten notes, tries their best, loves fashion and dogs, bright eyes like the sun, new cities, good grades
woodsmoke: tired souls, ticket stubs and street maps from places they’ve visited, bodies full of untold stories, missing the train, coffee, gentle words
wisteria: dreamy evenings, freshly-baked cinnamon rolls, sipping tea, writing in a diary, thick, worn-out jumpers, handfuls of flowers, falling in love, book piles
saltwater: dark, tousled hair, ripped jeans, paintbrushes, lofty grins, swallowing hard, a little broken, trying desperately to be a good person
ink: soft aching hands buried in messy hair, tragic smiles, scribbling on dusty parchment, ancient ruins, attic windows, stars, cups of tea gone cold
thunderstorms: leather jackets, eyeliner wings, sharpening their smiles, lace-up boots, vinyl records, wikipedia articles, tangled earphones, cigarette afternoons
Nothing but My Aching Soul 