Now I’m Ready

yuurinikiforov:

Last week, after seeing Yuuri’s anxiety while standing on the street and his one-sided contemplation of leaving the skating world I felt there was something missing. That at that point in the series Yuuri’s desire to leave skating seemed so, so based in his anxiety. In his inability to be the best, that he was letting Victor down, reflecting badly on Victor, and that he needed to just stop. That Yuuri’s drive to keep skating was still there, but he was tampering it down in his heart for what he thought he deserved.

In a complete 180 from that, after episode 10, I feel very content with the idea that Yuuri and Victor will leave the competitive skating world. Before the idea almost made me cringe, because it felt like Yuuri giving in to his anxiety. It made sense for Victor, yes, but not for Yuuri who has so much left to give.

But Yuuri’s won his prize now. The wording in the preview for episode 10, something golden and round, gave the fandom whiplash. “Omg RINGS, no it’s a medal no way, OMG IT WAS RINGS”

Somehow I feel the correlation that keeps being made is very important. Yuuri no longer needs the golden, round medals. He no longer needs to prove himself as the best skater. He went into competitive skating because of Victor. He wanted to skate with/for/against Victor. He wanted Victor to see him. And up until episode 10 Yuuri was still having doubts about how clearly Victor’s sight was. He was worried that once the season was over Victor would leave. Their time was over. But now it’s not. It never will be.

Losing his competitive edge for skating makes sense now. It makes sense now that his reason for skating has been completely achieved. He’s no longer giving in to his anxiety. It’s no longer that monster talking him down. It’s simply that he’s achieved his dreams. The final step something Victor has declared – marriage with a medal.

What does he have to gain from skating beyond that?

Victor, too, has been struggling all season with his career and what to do. Will he retire officially? Will he go back to skating? The world seems to want him back, but here he is chasing Yuuri. Something that has so much more meaning now after that banquet reveal. He’s been waffling and unsure because Yuuri has been unsure and he’s been questioning his heart. Victor was experiencing his own hidden anxiety in what Yuuri truly feels for him, because here is the boy who literally swept him off his feet dancing one night, and now he’s running away from him.

But Victor has also reached his meaning. He’s happy now. His 20+ years of avoiding life and love are over. He’s accepted them. He’s learned that there’s far more in the world that skating, that it’s okay to be beyond skating. He is not just Russia’s National Treasure. He is also Yuuri’s. And that title means so, so much more to him.

The last line of Stammi Vicino/Hanarezu ni Soba ni Ite:

Let’s Leave Together

Now I’m Ready

They’re there. They’re ready. Finally. They can make their exit from skating. But only now. Now that it is together.